Monster Prom Review: Everybody Run, The Prom Queen's..Undead
High school is already a nightmare without having to woo
literal demon spawn, but multiplayer dating sim Monster Prom makes you want to
relive the experience over and over. At times obtuse, at times hilarious, this
is an education in monster romanticism. But you may not learn the same lessons
as my friends and I, because its real strength lies in how varied each
playthrough can be.
It follows typical dating sim logic: There are only three
weeks left until prom, and you have to make the monster of your dreams swoon
for you, or risk going stag to Spooky High School’s biggest shindig of the
year. You have the choice of six suitors, from your typical werewolf and
mermaid princess to a hipster vampire Instaphile and an undead thrill-seeker
high on ecto-cocaine and constantly Yaaas-ing.
monster prom on pc
We live in an era where dating simulators are plentiful,
multifaceted and, oftentimes, bizarre. Whether you’re courting a selection of
eligible fathers looking for love, handsome warlords from a bygone dynasty, or
an actual horse, there’s truly something for everyone, and it can be hard for
any one entry to stick out from the crowd.
Walk Like A Zombie
Beautiful Glitch's take on the traditional dating sim
features a few twists that you don't normally see in the genre. For one, it's
based on a school full of monsters. Well, they're hardly monsters -- they look
like them, but they're about as grisly as a collection of Monster High dolls.
They're more like candy-colored humans, with some who rock snakes for hair or a
ghostly presence. The main crew, or love interests you can be paired up with,
consist of Ann Vera Oberlin, Polly Geist, Damien LaVey, Liam de Lioncourt,
Scott Howl, and Miranda Vanderbilt.
Your
player character doesn't even get a real personality to speak of, and little
social standing at Spooky High School. Unfortunately, you can only choose one
premade player character out of four different models at the beginning of the
game and name them to get started. It was a letdown to think I couldn't
customize my own monster high school student and was instead forced to choose
one of the four characters instead, none of which I was really enamored with at
the onset
Romance Is A Scream.
Once you choose a character, it's time to get started. As
the title implies, the premise is simple. You need to get someone to agree to
attend the Monster Prom with you. That's about it. There aren't any real rules
about what you need to do in order to achieve this goal, and the game isn't
very helpful at explaining the prerequisites you need to achieve it, so you
just kind of, well, get to clicking.
You'll start off by answering a few questions at the
beginning of the game, which lampoons mainstream teen magazines and their
"quiz" sections in a way that's gotten pretty tired by now. You'll
answer three questions, with the first two acting as determinants for your
beginning stats. The last one will have you choose an answer from six different
options, and your answer will determine which prom date you'll be assigned.
Yes, assigned.
This is where things begin to crumble, unfortunately. Most
dating sims let you carve out a path for yourself to meet all of the characters
and get a feel for what they're like before you're forced to pursue them as a
romantic interest. Assigning a character based on a personality quiz that you
may not even be answering honestly (assuming you typically do that) locks you
into getting the same character over and over. When I first started playing, I
chose honestly and aligned with the options I would have really gone with in
real life. This meant I ended up with Damien three times because I went with my
gut. I closed my eyes and began choosing at random, and this got me different
outcomes, but who wants to have their romantic routes preordained like that?
This means that whatever quiz answer you supplied the game
with at the beginning of the game will cement your fate with a certain monster.
If you answer a question with something boozy and dumb, you'll end up with
Polly, most likely. Cutthroat and revenge-laden? Vera. If you don't know the
characters very well, this can lead to some surprises, but once you've
memorized their personalities, this devolves into a predictable game of fill in
the blanks.
Bring On The Booing
Aside from the game mechanics, which feel more like an
afterthought than a legitimate attempt at a dating sim with depth, Monster Prom
has some of the worst "humor" I've seen in a game in some time. It's
not that it's objectively bad or that it's riddled with mistakes. It's just not
funny. Now, I'll admit there were a few double entendres I found
chuckle-worthy, but for the most part, the "jokes" were seemingly
there for shock value. I'm no stranger to surreal or even stupid humor, so it's
not that I can't appreciate it. It's just not humor.
It's just that it seemed like, rather than going for clever
setups and punchlines, Monster Prom's writers felt that saying "fuck"
and "bitch" and "motherfucker" all the time elevated the game
from quirky to Adult, Edgy, and Hilarious. It's crass for the sake of being
crass, "going there" to elicit shocked reactions from anyone who
thinks it's TOTALLY RANDOM AND FUNNAY!!1!11 that a student at school might be
selling a baggie of cocaine in the middle of the day. Drugs are so badass and
cool, guys, and an obvious mark of adulthood. That's the message I felt the
game really wanted me to come away with, most of all, as well as the fact that
the cringiest parts of internet culture are slowly seeping into our daily lives
a little too quicker than I'd have hoped.
I could go on for a few paragraphs about how out of touch
the humor feels, which somehow can't even touch Adult Swim's Z-list
celebrities' material, but just know this: If you think it's funny that a bunch
of emus suddenly appear in a gym and beat your characters up, then you'll have
a blast. If you think that all sounds like some nonsense from the writers of
The Big Bang Theory, you'll probably want to find something else to play. It
wouldn't be such a big deal if Monster Prom didn't rely so heavily on its humor
as a crutch, but it does, and it's a real bummer.
Ghost Tour
I'll give Monster Prom the fact that it includes multiplayer
options is a boon. You can play with up to four people, or even take your show
online. If you play with someone else, you'll take turns going from area to
area. Each turn is broken up with small party games, such as having all players
choose a topic and then judging the "worst" or the "best"
of said topic, such as who would make the worse ruler out of three players'
suggestions or similar silly games. I appreciated the attempts at making things
feel more special and inviting for groups to play, but these party game twists
were hardly significant enough to actually take a step back and do before
moving on with the game.
There's a lot to do if you plan on continuing to play after
your first few times, too. In fact, it's meant to be replayed over and over.
According to developer Beautiful Glitch, there are about 388 different
situations that you can encounter throughout your game, and over 1000 outcomes.
These are impressive numbers to be sure, but given that the actual prom date
endings aren't actually all that special, there's not really much incentive to
keep striving to see them all...unless you're cackling at the jokes, which
seems highly unlikely. I will say that in my 12+ first experimental
playthroughs, I made some wildly different decisions, however, and saw plenty
of scenes repeat themselves.
Dead On Arrival
Monster Prom had so much potential and so much to offer that
I couldn't wait to tear into it. And on a superficial level, it's an
interesting experiment that I thought I would love. Unfortunately, just like
the monsters you're courting, once you get to know it it's only a great-looking
shell with some fairly rotten insides. I'd like to see updates come down the
line to open up new romance options, additional things to do, more purpose for
the stats, and improved writing. Until then, I'll be sticking to the dating
sims that don't try and court me with "shocking" writing that's tamer
than what comes out of my mouth on a daily basis.
Romance Is A Scream.
Once you choose a character, it's time to get started. As
the title implies, the premise is simple. You need to get someone to agree to
attend the Monster Prom with you. That's about it. There aren't any real rules
about what you need to do in order to achieve this goal, and the game isn't
very helpful at explaining the prerequisites you need to achieve it, so you
just kind of, well, get to clicking.
You'll start off by answering a few questions at the
beginning of the game, which lampoons mainstream teen magazines and their
"quiz" sections in a way that's gotten pretty tired by now. You'll
answer three questions, with the first two acting as determinants for your
beginning stats. The last one will have you choose an answer from six different
options, and your answer will determine which prom date you'll be assigned.
Yes, assigned.
This isn't something I picked up on immediately when I had
my first playthrough, and the game doesn't explain it in terms that make it
clear-cut. Your first few choices will let you know what stats you're boosting:
"So bold!" or "So wealthy!" and so on. On the last question
of the personality quiz, small character heads and plus signs will float up
beside the choices you make, denoting which character is most aligned with
them. From then on after the quiz, you'll be destined to run into the character
chosen for you no matter what you do.
This is where things begin to crumble, unfortunately. Most
dating sims let you carve out a path for yourself to meet all of the characters
and get a feel for what they're like before you're forced to pursue them as a
romantic interest. Assigning a character based on a personality quiz that you
may not even be answering honestly (assuming you typically do that) locks you
into getting the same character over and over. When I first started playing, I
chose honestly and aligned with the options I would have really gone with in
real life. This meant I ended up with Damien three times because I went with my
gut. I closed my eyes and began choosing at random, and this got me different
outcomes, but who wants to have their romantic routes preordained like that?
This means that whatever quiz answer you supplied the game
with at the beginning of the game will cement your fate with a certain monster.
If you answer a question with something boozy and dumb, you'll end up with
Polly, most likely. Cutthroat and revenge-laden? Vera. If you don't know the
characters very well, this can lead to some surprises, but once you've
memorized their personalities, this devolves into a predictable game of fill in
the blanks.
You can choose one place in the school to visit each turn,
and after a brief scene that will bolster or force your stats to take a hit,
you'll see the character you're paired with, no matter what, with the exception
of the lunchroom. You can select which table you want to sit at here.
That doesn't mean you're always going to be lucky in love
with who's chosen for you, but it does make it hard to have encounters with
other monsters you decide you like better. You can purposefully try and guess
who will like which answers you throw out, but when you reach the end of the
set of turns in either the short or long game and choose a monster to ask to
prom, it all seems pointless. If Liam is the date chosen for you and you fail
all potential checks by giving him the wrong answers and choose Miranda, who
you vibed better with, you could end up with Miranda. But you hardly get enough
opportunities to interact with other characters to give you a viable option
other than your match, which makes choosing your date at all feel like a joke.
Aside from the game mechanics, which feel more like an
afterthought than a legitimate attempt at a dating sim with depth, Monster Prom
has some of the worst "humor" I've seen in a game in some time. It's
not that it's objectively bad or that it's riddled with mistakes. It's just not
funny. Now, I'll admit there were a few double entendres I found
chuckle-worthy, but for the most part, the "jokes" were seemingly
there for shock value. I'm no stranger to surreal or even stupid humor, so it's
not that I can't appreciate it. It's just not humor.
It's just that it seemed like, rather than going for clever
setups and punchlines, Monster Prom's writers felt that saying "fuck"
and "bitch" and "motherfucker" all the time elevated the game
from quirky to Adult, Edgy, and Hilarious. It's crass for the sake of being
crass, "going there" to elicit shocked reactions from anyone who
thinks it's TOTALLY RANDOM AND FUNNAY!!1!11 that a student at school might be
selling a baggie of cocaine in the middle of the day. Drugs are so badass and
cool, guys, and an obvious mark of adulthood. That's the message I felt the
game really wanted me to come away with, most of all, as well as the fact that
the cringiest parts of internet culture are slowly seeping into our daily lives
a little too quicker than I'd have hoped.
I could go on for a few paragraphs about how out of touch
the humor feels, which somehow can't even touch Adult Swim's Z-list
celebrities' material, but just know this: If you think it's funny that a bunch
of emus suddenly appear in a gym and beat your characters up, then you'll have
a blast. If you think that all sounds like some nonsense from the writers of
The Big Bang Theory, you'll probably want to find something else to play. It
wouldn't be such a big deal if Monster Prom didn't rely so heavily on its humor
as a crutch, but it does, and it's a real bummer.
Ghost Tour
I'll give Monster Prom the fact that it includes multiplayer
options is a boon. You can play with up to four people, or even take your show
online. If you play with someone else, you'll take turns going from area to
area. Each turn is broken up with small party games, such as having all players
choose a topic and then judging the "worst" or the "best"
of said topic, such as who would make the worse ruler out of three players'
suggestions or similar silly games. I appreciated the attempts at making things
feel more special and inviting for groups to play, but these party game twists
were hardly significant enough to actually take a step back and do before
moving on with the game.
There's a lot to do if you plan on continuing to play after
your first few times, too. In fact, it's meant to be replayed over and over.
According to developer Beautiful Glitch, there are about 388 different
situations that you can encounter throughout your game, and over 1000 outcomes.
These are impressive numbers to be sure, but given that the actual prom date
endings aren't actually all that special, there's not really much incentive to
keep striving to see them all...unless you're cackling at the jokes, which
seems highly unlikely. I will say that in my 12+ first experimental
playthroughs, I made some wildly different decisions, however, and saw plenty
of scenes repeat themselves.
Dead On Arrival
Monster Prom had so much potential and so much to offer that
I couldn't wait to tear into it. And on a superficial level, it's an
interesting experiment that I thought I would love. Unfortunately, just like
the monsters you're courting, once you get to know it it's only a great-looking
shell with some fairly rotten insides. I'd like to see updates come down the
line to open up new romance options, additional things to do, more purpose for
the stats, and improved writing. Until then, I'll be sticking to the dating
sims that don't try and court me with "shocking" writing that's tamer
than what comes out of my mouth on a daily basis.
Post a Comment